A Midsummer Etc. RevisedACT ONEA Midsummer Etc. Revised by livingcomforteagle
Theseus: Hippolyta! You are fairer than all the poetry Shakespeare ever wrote! I… can't even describe it! I mean, your stupid Amazon peoples were no match for me! Good thing we're getting married tomorrow. I just can't wait! Not like your people waited while I slaughtered them!
Hippolyta: [quietly]I hate you. [louder]I can wait!
Theseus: What was that, Hippolyta?
Hippolyta: Just a bit of a cold, you know how us Amazons get…
Theseus: Did I mention how I killed your stupid, bloody, violent, retarded, primitive, ugly peoples?
Hippolyta: Yes, yes, I think you did.
Egeus [entering]: So, Theseus, is it really murder if you kill your daughter in the name of the law? I mean, I don't want a guilty conscience when it's over, and everything.
Theseus: Of course it is – wait, did you say in the name of the law?
Egeus: Yes, I believe I did.
Theseus: Oh, it's okay then.
Hermia [entering]: Murderer! Scoundrel! Wretched beast of a father! Scum! Vile! You bloodthirsty dirt!